The Woman I Was Born To Be?
by MVP2
Summary: What happens when everything you believe to be true about yourself ends up to be a lie? Will the decision and sacrafice you made be able to save the people you love or will it drive you away from them forever when they discover that you are not the same?
1. Chapter 1

Samantha rode in the back of the limo looking at the city she once called home.

"Home" she said to herself, "Is this my home?"

It had been 5 years; five long years of hiding to protect the people she loved, but was it worth it she thought to herself.

Samantha's mind drifts to the horrible night where her life was changed forever:

It was a fogy night on the docks, Sam was suppose to meet Jason for dinner at Kelly's but got caught up with Reese and her annoying questions about Sonny's and Jason's mob activities.

"Gosh I hate that woman" she said to herself.

All of sudden Sam felt like she was being watched, so she turned around finding just the fog in the night. She shakes the feeling out of her mind, and continues her journey to Kelly's to meet Jason. "Jason" the man she loved with her whole heart and soul, the man who saved her from herself. Gosh did she love him.

Sam than hears another sound behind her. Now she knows something is really wrong.

"Who is there?" Sam says "Whoever you are...you better leave because I know how to protect myself" Sam pulls out her gun that Jason gave to her for a birthday gift.

It is so damn foggy Sam can't see past her hands holding the gun in front of her.She decides to back away, Kelly's is just around the corner, and the faster she gets there the faster she can get to safety. All of sudden Sam feels and hand cover mouth, and sting in her lower back causing her to lose grip of the gun. Sam tries to fight, but the person holding her is a lot stronger. All of a sudden Sam eyes starts to get heavy, and she feels her body weakening...and the last thing she remembers is be pulled away into the fog. And that voice of pure hatred saying..."You are mine now, my princess."

End ofFlashback:

A tear rolls down Sam's eye as the memory brings back a horrible event that she will never forget, and because of that one event she had become a different woman or the woman she was born to be.

The limo stops in front of the hotel. The driver lowers the windows and informs Sam they have arrived..."Ms. Cassadine we have arrived at the Metro Court".


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The light beams through his dark blinds. He has been awake for the last two hours just staring at the ceiling above. He looked at the clock and notices it's almost noon, "Noon" he says in a low voice….the moment his life changed forever.

Jason Flashback:

It has been three weeks and still no leads to Sam. Jason and Sonny have been using all their man power to find her, but they have come up dry. They even have Reese and the FBI helping them find her, but they have also found nothing.

Jason sat on Sonny's couch on the phone with all of his men and looking at all the documents in front of him trying to find anything that will lead him to Sam.

"You sure Sandavols are clean Max? Jason said  
"Yhea…they are clean Jason, there is nothing that we can find that can connect them to Sam disappearance", Max said on the other line  
"Ok…well I want you to still keep an eye on them just in case, you never know what my turn up" Jason said in a disappointed voice  
"Ok….Hey Jason, we will find her" Max said  
"I know….I know" Jason said and hung up.

Jason sunk back on the couch, and threw the phone on the desk when Sonny entered.

"Hey…anything new" Sonny said with a hopeful voice, "No….we still got nothing!" Jason said staring off in the distance. "Jason we will find her, I know she is out there somewhere waiting for you to come to her" Sonny said trying to build up his hope. "I don't know Sonny, I feel something at the bottom of my stomach that something bad has happened to her", "Jason, you can't let that feeling sink into your thoughts, you have to stay positive and determined that you will find her" Sonny said while looking at Jason straight in the eye. "I know Sonny….but…" Jason was interrupted by Rico, "Agent Marshall is here to see you two, she says it's urgent", "Ok let her in" Sonny said.

"Hey" Reese said entering the living room. "Any new information you have for us?" Sonny asked, "Actually yes I do have some new information" Reese said with a state of disappointment in her eyes that Jason caught. "Ok what is it?" Jason said, "Umm….I am sorry to break the news, but….we have found Sam's body" Reese said with remorse in her voice and eyes. "You What!…No…No…No. You must me mistaken, it can't be Sam, It can't!" Jason said in emotional voice and tears in his eyes. "I'm sorry Jason, but we have, and I need you to come to the morgue and identify her", "You damn right I am coming with you, and I will prove that you and all those pricks are wrong, that is not Sam's body!" Jason said. "I will come along" Sonny said, "No! I want you to stay here, and keep on searching for her, we can't stop this search!" Jason said and than turned and left with Reese.

Jason entered the cold steeled room. "She must be wrong, she is wrong that is not Sam" he kept repeating in his head. The morgue employee motioned Jason to the table in the middle of the room with Reese at his side. "Are you ready?" the employee asked Jason, "Yhea…I am" Jason said with a hint of worry. He lifts the sheet, and Jason almost faints from what he sees. He quickly exits the room, and runs out to the lobby with Reese on his tail. "Jason…Jason, are you alright?" Reese says, "That was…it was Saaam" Jason says with tears rolling down his cheeks. He collapses on the floor, and Reese falls besides him, and lightly hugs him while he cries. In his cries, Jason looks at the clock on the wall reading…12:00pm….Noon.

End of Flashback

Now here he is in their bed, staring at the ceiling. He hears her whimper, and feels her hands move across his chest. "Hey…you are awake. Did you have a good time last night because I sure did?" she said, "Yhea it was ok" Jason said. "Ok?…Well I am hurt" she said, "Well sorry about that, I think you should be leaving now. Your money is on the table downstairs. Four Hundred Dollars like we agreed". "Are you sure you don't want to go for another ride?", she said while circling her fingers on Jason's chest, "Yes I am sure, I had enough last night, so you can leave now" Jason said removing her hand off his chest with force. "Fine!" she said with annoyance, and quickly got dressed. Before exiting out the room she must ask…"Umm…I never got your name?", "Good, because you don't need to know" he said back with his ice stare. She got the clue, and quickly left.

After twenty more minutes staring at the ceiling, Jason makes his way to the bathroom, and stares at himself in the mirror. He puts his hand on his chest where that woman just made circles with her fingers, "The only woman who will ever make circles on my chest is Sam" he said to himself, "She will be the only woman to circle my heart". He turns from the mirror and gets in the shower; today is going to be a long day.

Across Town:

"Ms. Cassadine we have arrived at the Metro Court" the limo driver said, "I see we have, but if I am not mistaken you were given the orders to drop me off in the back entrance, correct?" "Yes...I was, but I thought you will want to see" the limo driver said before cut off by Sam, "You thought wrong, what is your name?", "Ryan", "Well Ryan if I was you I will begin to drive this limo towards the back entrance if you value your job". "Ok Ms. Cassadine….bitch" Ryan says in a low tone, "Excuse me?" Sam said, "Nothing...Nothing" Ryan says trying to save himself.

The limo rounds Metro Court and stops at the back entrance. The door opens, "Hello Samantha", "Hello Justin" Sam says while stepping out the limo. "Damn!" Sam yells while stepping in a puddle, "There goes $2000 worth of high heels, Justin can you please call Donatella Versace and tell her to send me another pair of her black spring wear high heels?", "Ok…I will call her as soon as you get settled", "Thank You" Sam said.

Justin and Sam walk to the private elevator leading them to her penthouse suite. They enter the elevator, and Sam looks at Justin with an annoyed grin. "Is he here?" she asked, "No he is not, he is arriving tomorrow night" he replied. "Is she here?" she asked with an even more annoyed voice, Justin laughs and says "Yhea…she is here. She arrived last night, and is waiting for you in the suite". "Great" Sam said rolling her eyes.

The elevator doors open, and they walk too the suite door, she inhales a deep breath, and motions Justin to open the door. Sam walks in and sees her looking out the window. "Hello, Grandmother", Sam says with a fake smile, "Oh Samantha, you have finally arrived" Helena says "How was your flight from Greece?", "It was less than delightful, but here I am" Sam says putting down her Gucci purse. "Well my sweet child, come here" Helena said motioning Sam to the window, which Sam obliged. "Look at this view Samantha, soon this will all belong to you", Helena says, "Yes Grandmother I know" Sam says back. "Do you Samantha? Do you? Look at me" Helena says, and Sam turns to look at her, "We have been preparing you for your whole life for this moment, and you must follow through", "I will grandmother, I will" Sam says back with confidence in her voice. "Good, now go get some rest. You are going to need your energy for tomorrow night.", "Ok grandmother." Sam says while heading to her bedroom. "Oh and Samantha, he picked a gown for you for tomorrow night, it's on your bed" Helena says, and Sam continues to her bedroom.

She looks at the gown on her bed. "Huh…he will pick something like this. Dark as usual" Sam says and falls on the bed. "Well I better rest because tomorrow night at the Nurses Ball I am going to need all my energy, especially when I see…Jason".


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

Jason rode in his car heading to Sonny's and Brenda's house. He still can't believe those two are back together. After Sam's death, Brenda came back to town and she fell back in love with Sonny, and of course they played their little cat and mouse game like they usually played, but Sonny finally caught Brenda and married her two years ago. They had a little girl together named Julia (after Brenda's sister) who was a little over one year old. That makes three kids for Sonny: Kristina, Morgan, and Julia. Michael is now a full blown Quartermaine, and doesn't give a damn about Sonny now that AJ is in his life. It also didn't help when Carly remarried AJ and pumped even more bad thoughts into Michael's head.

Carly and AJ, ELQ's proud super couple, see after Michael was returned Sonny, Carly, and AJ were in a year long custody battle. Michael didn't want to live with Sonny or Carly, only AJ, and after battling out for a year, Carly gave up and reunited with AJ turning her back on Sonny. "Not a big surprise" Jason thought since he knew Carly is a professional back stabber from his own experience, but they still remained friends. They don't talk much though because Carly is too busy running ELQ with AJ, after Edwards's death he left the company to Michael with Carly and AJ as guardians of his estate. Lets just say Tracy wasn't happy with this, and Carly and her are bitter enemies. The police are called over the Q mansion at least once a month to break up numerous food fights between the family.

The only one he can tolerate is Emily. She is still married to Nicolas and they have a three year old son together named Stefan. Nicolas was released from jail four years ago after Helena was caught, and he helped heal Emily through her rape aftermath. This was a big weight lifted off Elizabeth and Lucky whom was married a year after. They now actually live across the hall from him raising Cameron together. That little boy looks so much like his father Zander that it is scary. "I wonder if Sam and I would have had kids by now?" Jason thought to himself again, but quickly shakes his head and continues his drive to Sonny's. Sonny wants him to help persuade Alexis to let him take Kristina to the Nurses ball, "I don't know why he thinks I can persuade Alexis?", but deep down he does know. After Sam's death Alexis and him bonded somewhat, it was weird, but she helped him heal some scars, but not all of them.

Alexis is now married to Ned. Alexis and Ric shortly divorced after their son Trevor was born when Alexis caught Ric in bed with Reese. Their divorce wasn't pretty, but they did come to an agreement of shared custody, and tried to rebuild their friendship over the years. Ric and Reese are now married, and Reese is pregnant with their first child. Reese and Jason still don't get along, but they have become to tolerate each other. "At least she is no longer going after Sonny and me, and decided to become a full time lawyer".

Jason pulls into Sonny's driveway, and quickly exit's the car. He greets Max who is eating his turkey sandwich as usual. He walks into the house, and he hears the war going on in the living room. "Sonny/Alexis War Take One Million" he said to himself before opening the door. "I want Kristina at the Nurses Ball sitting with me!" Sonny said while drinking his brandy, "No! She will sit with Ned, Trevor, and I! There is no way in hell I will let her sit with you. You never know who may pull a gun on you at your table!" Alexis spitted out, "Great at least they decided Kristina is going, but now they are fighting over where she is sitting." Jason thought to himself when Sonny notices he arrived. "Jason tell this woman that my daughter is sitting at my table" "No. Jason tell this prick here that my daughter is sitting at my table", "Prick? Well you bi…", "Sonny!" Brenda yelled from the stairs before Sonny can finish. "Watch your mouth, we have kids in this house. Now Jason can you please help clear this up before Sonny starts throwing the barware" Brenda said, "Ok...have you guys even asked Kristina where she will want to sit?" Jason asked, "No" Alexis and Sonny said, "Well maybe you should." "Ok...Kristina! Can you please come downstairs please!" Brenda yelled from the stairs, Kristina comes speeding down the stairs "You called." she said with a smile on her face. "Kristina we were wondering, who do you want to sit with at the Nurses Ball? Mommy or Daddy?" Jason asked, "Well I will like to sit with Mommy…" Alexis shoots a grin at Sonny "…for the first half of the night, but I will like to sit with Daddy for the second half" Kristina says, and a huge smile comes across Sonny's face. "Well this is now handled. Kristina will sit with you Alexis for the first half and you Sonny for the second half. Now I am going to the warehouse to get some work down. I will talk to you later Sonny" Jason said walking to towards the door.

"Jason, Jason wait!" Brenda yelled before Jason reached the door. "What? Brenda" Jason said a little annoyed, "Well I was wondering if you found a date for the Nurses ball tonight?", "I am not going Brenda, and you know I hate parties.", "You should really come. You always went in the past, and it will be a way to honor Robin". "Robin" Jason thought, my first love. "We are all still mourning her death Jason, and I think she would have loved for you to be there." Brenda said, "Ok…I will go for Robin, but I won't stay long." Jason said, "Fine, just as long as you come. And what about a date?", "No date", "Ok…I get the hint, but Jason, Sam would have wanted for you to finally move on.", "You don't know crap what Sam would have wanted! You never met her, so don't speak like you would have known what she wanted! I have to go, see you tomorrow night Brenda." Jason said and quickly went out the door, and slammed it behind him. "He is still hurting Brenda" Sonny said coming behind Brenda, "I know, but he needs to move on. I hate seeing him like this. All he does is work, cleaning up your messes, and just having the occasional one night stand with a hooker. This isn't the Jason I used to know" Brenda said in disappointed voice while looking at Sonny. "You know they say when your great love dies a part of your soul dies with them. And Brenda when I thought you died all those years ago I thought a part of my soul died with you". Brenda looks at Sonny with tears in her eyes, and kisses him passionately, "Get a room!" Alexis said walking past them before exiting the house causing Brenda and Sonny to break their kiss.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:

Morning the next day:

"Good morning Samantha, come sit with me and drink some tea" Helena said to Sam who was walking into the living room. "Thank you Grandmother, I really needed this cup of tea", Sam said grabbing her cup from Helena, and sitting down on the couch. Over the last five years Sam had learned to crave whole lot new things, I guess once you start to living a higher lifestyle, you learn to want things you did not want before. "Did you sleep well last night" Helena asked while drinking her tea, "Yes, and I am rested and prepared for tonight's event". "That is great to hear, you know the peasants in this town don't have clue that we were the ones who supplied them with the finances to start up this so called Nurses Ball again", "Really? How did you keep it secret?", "Oh my dear, I have my ways of sneaking around a few road blocks" Helena said with a smile on her face. "So grandmother, when will he be arriving tonight?", "He should be here by the time we are ready to make our grand entrance at the ball. I can't wait too see the faces of all those people who used too look at me like I was crazy", "I can't wait too see a few faces too Grandmother, especially Natasha's.", "Oh Natasha, the bastard child of the family, I can't wait to see her grovel which she will do once she finds out what we have planned"

"Your former love will also be there tonight my dear" Helena says eyeing Sam, "Which one?" Sam asks grinning, "You know which one. When he sees you he is not going to know what to do with himself." Helena says, "Well I don't want to think about that now, I must stay focus on our goal. Like you always say, I have been preparing for this all my life." Sam says with a hint of sadness that Helena caught, "Samantha, are you still angry on how we did things? Oh my dear, it was the only way we could prepare you." Helena says while motioning Sam's face to look at her. "We had to give you too Cody McCall so he can prepare you for this. Your con-artist and tough girl persona is what will help you through this.", "I know Grandmother, but I just can't help but think if I grew up with my real family than my life would have been different. I wouldn't have gone through all the horrible experiences." Sam says with tear in her eyes, and Helena slaps her right across the face. "Samantha Cassandra Cassadine! Cassadines do not cry, we suck it up, and we turn our emotions into weapons. That is what you will use your bad experiences for…weapons." Helena says with evil in her voice. Sam holds her hand to her face and cannot believe her grandmother just slapped her, but she knew Helena was right, "You are right Grandmother, and I am sorry. I am a Cassadine, and I must act as one. I will use my experiences as weapons towards the people who crossed my path, and I will make them regret for ever looking at me as if I am trash. They will pay dearly." Sam says with confidence that will make anyone take notice. "Now there is my granddaughter that I have grown so fond of" Helena says with a smile, "I have to get ready now Grandmother for tonight's ball, I will be in my room if you need me." Sam says getting off the couch and heading to her room.

Sam sat in front of mirror of her bedroom. She looks at her reflection and sees a very different woman than the Sam she used to be five years. Of course, on the outside she looks more high class with her designer clothes, and $10,000 dollar hair cut, and $20,000 worth of make up on. She must admit she looks damn good for 33 years old. However, this is only face value; she has really changed in her heart. If you can say she still has a heart? Over the years, she has learned the Cassadine way of living with darkness and revenge, and that has seeped into her heart. Helena has informed her of all the things that have been going on in Port Charles since she has been gone. She knows that Sonny is now with Brenda, the woman that he loved with all his heart and used Sam as a substitute for. She knows that Carly and AJ are back together, and cannot help but laugh at the thought. She always knew Carly was a professional whoring backstabber, and it did not surprise her that she backstabbed little Ricky Ricardo (Sonny). She heard about Nicolas's and Emily's little happy life together, and cannot wait to see Nicolas again for obvious reasons. She also knew about the Alexis/Ned/Ric/Reese drama, and she cannot wait for Natasha too see some real drama in her life that she promises she will bring to her. "The woman will pay for what she put me through all those years ago" Sam says too herself. Finally Helena has kept Sam informed of Jason's life for over the last five years. Helena tried to fill Sam's head with Jason hatred, but Sam knew the type of man Jason was, and it did help that she had a little birdie giving her information on his life. Sam gets up from her chair, "All in due time, all in due time." she says too herself.

Across Town:

"Jason open up the door! Jason!" she says on the other side of the penthouse door. Jason comes down the stairs and does not want to see her, but he opens the door anyways, "What do you want Courtney?", "Hi, Jason. Isn't it a wonderful morning?" Courtney says and walks in. Jason just looks at her, and does not feel like going through this right now, "Yes, Courtney it's a nice morning". "Well you look less than delighted, but what's new? Anyways I was wondering if you are going to the Nurses Ball tonight?" she says with a big bright smile on her face. Jason knew this was coming, "Yes I am Courtney, and I don't need a date", "Oh come on please. I really need to go with someone. Jax is out of town on business, and the hospital board needs me there, but I don't want to go alone." Courtney says with bunny sad eyes, "Gosh that is sickening" Jason thought to himself. "And you can't go alone?" Jason asked, "Nope, and Jax told me to ask you since he knows that you wouldn't have a date.", "I am going to kill Jax for this" Jason thought. Since Sam's death Jason and Jax have started a little friendship if you call it that, they both loved Sam, and it was through her death that they began to respect each other. "Ok Courtney, Ok. I will go with you, but only to escort you, I won't be staying long", "Fine I will take that. Now do you have a suit for tonight?" she asked, "Yes I have a suit, and I will pick you up around seven. Now if you don't mind I have some business I need to take care of" Jason said while ushering Courtney to the door. "Ok I will leave you too your "business", but don't be late. I have to be there for all the press" she said as she was walking to the elevator. Jason was about the close door when Courtney yelled for him "Jason! Thank you. This really means a lot" she said with a smile, and Jason was a little unease by it, but brushed it off, "No problem Courtney, you should be really be thanking your husband though." Jason said before closing the door. Jason walks to the couch and drops down and looks at all the paper work in front of him. "I can't believe I was ever married to that woman. Well at least it was not legal".


End file.
